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The Need To Understand…

As I looked at all of this and took that giant step back and attempted to understand how I - a mother – in a few months – could come to understand so much in her son in terms what appeared to be going on, I could not help but ask myself:  Had no one else seen this?  How was it that with all the billions poured into research… with all the doctors… the scientists… etc., how was it that I had come to understand so much that so many – it appeared - had failed to understand?   I certainly was not saying I had “all the answers”, but clearly, many of the issues I had raised in this text were very much “in the ballpark”.  

In my opinion, so much of all this fit together like a glove in terms of what was now known of functioning within the human body, that, truly, I wondered why it was that others had not seen – what I had seen.   Granted, much of the research into so many issues that had so helped me to “break the code” for my own son, had been fairly recent.    In the last few years, science had moved forward at lightning speed – of that, there could be no doubt.  Yet, as I had read so many articles, clearly, it was obvious many in science had seen what I had also seen – a connection among so many of these disorders.   But, not everything was “recent”.   Science had known for over one hundred years the dangers of mercury.   Science had also known for a very long time that iron – in excess – was toxic.   And science had known a lot of other things too… for a very long time.   Yet, even in these areas – the basics – in terms of issues of safety – had clearly been neglected when it came to human health and animal health as well.

Why… why… why… why… why?

Why had the battle of parents with autism been such a difficult one?   Although their attempts had failed, why had the government felt the need to attempt to seal records as they related to vaccine injury lawsuits?

As I thought about all these issues and the fact that the Bush family had very close ties to both the CIA and Eli Lilly, I could not help but wondered about how so many powerful players could potentially fit into all this.  Whether or not it was “just coincidence” that the same names kept “popping up”, no one could know for sure.

Yet, the close relationship that existed between “the government” and the pharmaceutical industry had bothered me for quite some time.   It truly appeared that in matters relating to public health, the FDA was nothing more than a “rubber stamper”, requiring little or no research to have potentially very dangerous products from the pharmaceutical industry – “approved”.

Clearly from dockets filed by the dental industry, the FDA was aware of the dangers of things like mercury.   And certainly, the FDA knew of the toxic effects of iron.   As such, why had it so failed the public in the regulation of such toxins?   And, more importantly, why did the FDA continue to affiliate itself  - not with the consumer – but with the pharmaceutical industry and those agencies in charge of vaccination programs in spite of the fact that the FDA’s responsibility was – to the consumer!  

As I continued to think about the role of the FDA and of the overall relationship between government and the pharmaceutical industry – both past and present – I had a difficult time “forgetting” about projects between the government and the pharmaceutical industry – projects like MKUltra.  The thought of being a “lab rat” for the pharmaceutical industry certainly was not an “appealing thought” to me – especially not if those “experiments” could involve my child.

Granted, as a result of MKUltra, “changes” had been made as they related to “informed consent” in terms of “participation”.   But, what exactly was “informated consent”?

I supposed that in looking at the changes that had come about as they related to “informed consent” in matters such as MKUltra that it was easy to get that “comfort” that this had just been a bad time in our history and this was “no longer being done”, and as such, “we could all breathe easily” because our government had “protected us”. 

Each time I had provided my signature for my son to get a vaccination, had that not been – “informed consent”?   Had I not consented to allowing the pharmaceutical industry to inject into my son substances they knew were toxic?   Of course, the issue becomes – did I know?  

In providing my signature to have my son vaccinated – never – not once – had I been provided with information as it related to the fact that within these vaccines there were substances like mercury and aluminum – some of the most dangerous substances known to man… substances that when combined… increased to unknown toxicities.   Had I known that, perhaps I would have been a little more reluctant to provide that “informed consent” – because truly, it had not been “informed” – at all!  I was simply told a “small rash” or “fever” was normal but that if the rash or fever seemed reason for concern, to bring Zachary to the clinic for follow-up.   Not once had I been provided with a vaccine insert showing me “the dangers”, “the side effects”, etc. associated with vaccinations.  Not once had the discussion of these issues ever been raised by my son’s pediatrician.   The only thing that happened was I was asked to “sign”- just a sheet with signature for “record purposes”. 

I provided my signature, but there was no information that had been provided to me explaining “the dangers”of these pharmaceutical products – no information whatsoever – not from the manufacturer, not from the FDA, not from the doctor!  So, the question remained – was that “informed consent” – in my opinion – it was not because many critical facts had been kept from me.

Likewise, when our service men and women signed up to join the army, navy, airforce and marines, did their signature provide that “informed consent” allowing the government and the pharmaceutical industry to pump many toxins into their systems  - at once!   Was that “informed consent”?   I seriously doubted the government had taken the time to allow these young men and women to read all the vaccine inserts for the many vaccines they had been exposed to.

As I thought about the military and the many “shots” they were expected to subject themselves to in a very short time, I truly had concerns for soldiers, as  they could very much be nothing more than human lab rats for the pharmaceutical industry and government agencies involved in vaccination programs.

Recently, our President, George W. Bush, had been given a smallpox vaccine.   There had been a lot of “PR” associated with this event.   President Bush had commented that he would never subject our troops to something he would not be personally willing to do himself.

Well, as great as that sounded, the simple fact was that this particular vaccine – the smallpox vaccine – did not contain mercury.   Nor did President Bush actually “do” something that our troops were expected “to do”.   In order to “do that”, the President would have had to subject himself to the “full line of vaccines” that soldiers were required to take – within the same timeframe – vaccines that included not only smallpox, but many others as well – many containing mercury and aluminum!   As such, President Bush had not “done” anything that even came close to what soldiers were expected “to do” when it came to rolling up their sleeves.

“Sign on the line… walk the line…”

Was this not what was expected of our servicemen and women as we injected them with untold toxins at once via vaccines – vaccines that had been approved on little more than thirty day studies?

The thing I had found particularly toubling in these matters as they related to the military was the fact that servicemen and women had “disorders”, such as “Gulf War Syndrome”, in spite of the fact that they had never been deployed to the Gulf in the last “gulf war” of the early 1990s.   How could that be?   Had “Gulf War Syndrome” not been as a result of “the gulf war” but – perhaps - the result vaccine injury from vaccines given in preparation of the “gulf war”?   How could a soldier that had never been to the Gulf come down with “Gulf War Syndrome”?

The following link,, provided information based on a study of this “mystery illness” known as “Gulf War Syndrome”.   This study had been conducted by Bradley N.Doebbeling, MD, MSc, at the University of Iowa College of Medicine in Iowa City. Iowa.   Note the following comments in this article – again – I quote:

“They suffer from recurrent headaches, joint stiffness, nausea, anxiety, and depression… Their symptoms have been the focus of numerous studies over the last decade, including one recent report of brain cell damage similar to that seen in the early stages of  Parkinson's disease… Doebbeling's study involved more than 3,600 veterans -- all living in Iowa, with approximately half of them having been deployed to the Persian Gulf… Deployed veterans reported the same symptoms as nondeployed military….his high level of such diverse symptoms is difficult to explain as a single illness and fails to support the hypothesis that there is a Gulf War syndrome," Doebbeling tells WebMD. "It would be uncharacteristic of any single illness. But that also doesn't mean that something isn't going on."… In studies of past wars, veterans have reported similar patterns of chronic symptoms, says researcher Kenneth C. Hyams, MD, MPH, director of epidemiology at the U.S. Naval Research Center in Bethesda, Md… "We found the same difficult-to-explain symptoms among veterans of all major wars…”  [end of quote, emphasis added, WebMD Health, Gulf War Syndrome Still a Mystery, by Jeanie Lerche Davis,].

Note that there were several key statements here.   “Mystery disorder” – well, that certainly sounded familiar.   Joint stiffness, nausea, anxiety, depression – familiar again.   Brain cell damage… familiar again.   Parkinson’s disease…familiar again… some studies estimated that up to one third of those with “Gulf War Syndrome” went on to develop Parkinson’s – that degenerative disorder most closely associated with – Alzheimer’s. 

Of course, one could argue – well, it must be exposure to chemicals during war…

Well, again, that argument did not hold water as clearly indicated in this article, also posted on WebMD’s website,, entitled: “Chemicals Not Linked to Gulf War Illness. No Evidence That Solvents, Insecticides Caused Veterans' Symptoms”, again, by Jeanie Lerche Davis, Reviewed by Michael Smith, MD.

And there was also this very interesting article, by Todd Ackerman, Houston Chronicle Science Writer Staff, entitled “UT research: Gulf War vets may face brain disease” posted at,… again, I quote:

“About 100,000 troops who fought in the Persian Gulf in 1990 and 1991 have complained of an array of symptoms that have become known as Gulf War syndrome… The symptoms include chronic fatigue, muscle and joint pain, memory loss, sleep disorders, chronic diarrhea, balance disturbances, depression and concentration problems… Haley predicts between 20,000 and 80,000 Gulf War veterans now in their 20s and 30s may develop Parkinson's or other neurological diseases in their 40s, 50s and 60s…” [end of quote, emphasis added, “UT research  Gulf War vets may face brain disease” by Todd Ackerman, Houston Chronicle Science Writer Staff, posted at].

Again… so many “familiar” things… in terms of “symptoms”… and the very obvious fact that Gulf War Syndrome was resulting in “epidemic” disorders.

Genetics?… “Informed consent”?

Had “signing up” to join the service been “informed consent” as had been my signature on a spreadsheet that provided only for signature lines for each vaccine – with no information provided whatsoever?   Had that, unknowingly, been my “informed consent” as required as a result of the MKUltra fiasco that supposedly prevented the pharmaceuticals and the government from “experimenting” on the population?   Yet, with no long-term studies, was that not exactly what was happening? 

I had asked my pediatrician for a complete record of my son’s medical history.  This was something I advised all persons to do because after a few years, medical records could be destroyed.   Amazingly, it had taken me close to four months to get a – “complete” file.   Bits and pieces were always missing and I had to “re-request them”.  Originally, I had been provided with perhaps twenty pages.   By the time I had Zachary’s complete file, it was closer to a full inch thick and that was provided only after a great deal of follow up with this particular hospital and affiliated clinic.

What had surprised me as I had requested Zachary’s files was that I had to go to “different places” to get the information.   The hospital had not provided the pediatrician with a copy of Zachary’s records as they related to his stay at the hospital when he was first born.  Why not?   Was that not “odd”?   I had provided the hospital with my pediatrician’s name.   He was affiliated with their hospital.   They knew exactly where to find him – just down the street – less than a block away.   Yet, the hospital had not provided my son’s records for the pediatrician.   Given that it was not my regular pediatrician that had been involved in the delivery – as was so often the case for mothers given you had to go with whomever was “on call” when you went into labor – did it not make “sense” to at least have provided those files for my son’s pediatrician? 

Zachary was low on glucose at birth.   Would that not have been something the pediatrician should have monitored – especially given science knew abnormal glucose levels could be an indication of diabetes – a potentially life-threatening condition!  

Zachary – low on glucose at birth – a sign of a problem – on day one – a child whose immature and dysfunctional system had been assaulted time and time again via vaccines – a child who now found himself with – autism!

As I considered MKUltra and the fact that LSD had been used – an acid – I could not help but think of the parallels of this “acid” to mercury.   An acid “ate away” at the brain… and so did mercury.   The CIA had attempted to do “mind control” – I could very easily control my son if I knew how to – his brain worked very much – literally – like a computer – until new connections could be re-established.   A computer had “no emotions” and neither did many children with autism – although, clearly those had emerged in Zachary with a little time as more and more, he came out of his shell.   Of course, as I came to help Zachary, clearly, his emotions were coming out and clearly, he was finally being able to start to “think for himself” as he put more and more pieces of his world together.  Yet, putting his world “together” had been so very difficult for Zachary.   I had spent countless hours working with him and the progress seemed so very, very slow in so many basic areas for so long.  Yet, now, I had great hope for my son, in spite of knowing that there were still very difficult times ahead.

But, clearly, also, I knew that children such as Zachary could very much – potentially – be manipulated and abused by projects such as MKUltra that attempted to manipulate human thought – and actions and other “scientific” experiments – given, in my opinion, how valuable these children had now become to the very organizations so many parents believed had caused this devastation in the first place! 

I had debated a long time as to whether or not to even mention the issue of “mind control” in this text.  However, as a parent of a child with autism, I knew that if there were any chance my child could be abused in such “experiments”, I, personally, would want to know that.  This had implications for so many children and persons with mental illness – actually – for all persons - that I simply, in my heart, could not remain silent on these issues because in all this, I clearly saw the potential for the reigniting of projects such as “MKUltra”!  As such, I encouraged all persons to be very, very cautious in any “study” involving their children or loved ones – whether suffering from these disorders or not.

The simple fact was that if my theory was correct that those functions co-located in the brain were much more inter-related than we could ever have imagined, then, given higher thought and motor activity, planning and execution were in the same part of the brain – the frontal lobe – that meant that our behaviors were very much a function of our thoughts – and if those thoughts could in any way be manipulated, the dangers of that were certainly cause for concern.

The best example of the danger of inaccurate or dangerous thoughts and my now very real concern over “thought manipulation” was the effect that evolution theory had obviously had on so many in history.  For persons with mental illness, and indeed, all persons, this had huge implications.

Darwin, Hitler, Mussalini, Stalin, Marx, the KKK, etc. – all of these – and so, so many others, had believed in evolution and, the belief that certain races were superior to others and as such, that “lower races” had to be exterminated or were “disposable” for the “greater good” – to achieve a “purer” race.

All of these men had not only “believed” in evolution – they had also very much – engaged in actually putting these principles into practice - by killing tens of millions!

There was something that perhaps very few persons realized – the full name of Charles Darwin’s original text – known by most simply as “Origin of Species”.  Charles Darwin was the founder of “evolution theory”.  His text had a much longer title originally.   Its initial or original title had been:

“Origin of Species by Means Of Natural Selection – The Preservation of Favoured Races in the Struggle For Life.”  [emphasis added - source:  Dangers of Evolution, by Dr. Kent Hovind, Part 5].

Indeed, Dr. Hovind had a copy of this book – with its original title!

Certainly, it was easy to believe that “those days were gone”… but were they?

Amazingly, as I watched a video by Dr. Kent Hovind, a creation scientist who had spent his life showing the world the lies and dangers of evolution, and how so many millions had been put to death because of the “putting in practice” of the theory of evolution I could not help but think that deception was well rooted in so many areas of life. 

Many major religions were grounded in beliefs that simply made my mouth drop as I watched Dr. Hovind’s video entitled: The Dangers of Evolution, available via his organization, Creation Science Evangelism, in Pensacola, Florida (850-479-3466, In my opinion, this certainly was another organization worth supporting financially.

Dr. Hovind’s videos were not copyrighted – on purpose.   You could purchase a copy and then make copies for others.    So often, in the last year I had told my husband that “nothing would surprise me any more”… well, there was so much on this video… that truly, it left me  - speechless!

Evolution was taught as “fact” in all of science – from elementary school – to higher education.   Children today were exposed to the lies of evolution – in the overwhelming majority of science textbooks - and indoctrinated into believing the beliefs of evolution theory – or survival of the fittest - from a very, very young age.   This belief had infiltrated our schools, our moral, religious, political, social and economic systems and the absolutely amazing thing, was that it was all based on “a theory” that had not one shred of evidence to support it – it all very much appeared to be completely - “made up”.

Perhaps that finally explained why so much I had seen “in science” simply made no sense and was not “supported” by fact.   If the basis of “science” was evolution, well… let us just say that my view of “science” had been drastically changed in terms of its “revelation of the truth” – in autism or many other disorders known to man, as well as in terms of astronomy, geology, biology, and every other “ogy” relating to “science”!   So much of my world had been so completely turned upside down as I had sought to understand autism and “science”!   So much I had seen in “science” had simply not “made any sense” to me.    Now, I knew why that had been.

Indeed the geologic record clearly did not support evolution… and neither did the scientific record.   The implications of evolution theory, for humanity, had been and continued to be absolutely devastating for within this doctrine were the foundations for – racism.

Indeed, evolution had proven to have horrible implications for man, and was the basis behind everything from slavery to actual extermination of races believed to be “of lower origin” – a practice, still very much alive today!

So convinced was Dr. Kent Hovind that evolution was but a theory, that his organization offered a quarter of a million dollars to anyone who could provide proof of evolution.   That “prize” had yet to be redeemed! 

Dr. Hovind had now lectured throughout the world on these issues.   Time and time again he had invited persons believing in evolution theory to debate him in a public forum… time and time again – they had refused.   I know that I, for one, would much rather see a major news channel carry a debate between Dr. Hovind and the best in creation science verses some of the best in evolution theory instead of an election debate.   I had seen my share of those, but, the fact was, this “Creation Vs Evolution” debate thing certainly would be very, very interesting to say the least!   Was it not amazing that such debates were never shown on television – the best of both sides – “going at it”!

Certainly, if networks were truly looking “for ratings”, a debate between Dr. Hovind and others of his liking on the “creation side of the argument” against “the best in evolution theory” could, without a doubt provide enough information for an entire “mini-series” – surely to be watched by untold masses concerned in matters of endtimes!   The “Left Behind” series had generated enough interest to show that these were issues of interest to society.   So, why not give society what it wanted and put on such a debate and let us once again get to the truth! 

As I researched matters relating to autism, how the human brain functioned, how easily the brain could be deceived and manipulated and came to discover the truth about evolution and then thought about this “theory” in relation to technologies such as vagas nerve stimulation, technologies that had the potential to not only stop seizures, but literally  “to create” delusions by stimulating specific parts of the brain, as a Christian, I very clearly saw the implications of all this from both a “danger for manipulation of others” and an end times perspective.  

The psychic seizure was now a well-documented scientific fact – a seizure that did not necessarily involve spastic motor functions. 

In this type of seizure, a person experienced an altered sense of reality, altered sensory perception (visual, auditory, olfactory, etc), altered memory (déjà vu, jamais vu, memory recall and memory gap issues), emotional issues (pleasure, sadness, fear, depression, anger, etc.), depersonalization, the feeling of the “presence” of others, forced thinking, a distortion in body image, and a new term for me – heautoscopy – the seeing of one’s double! [reference: Aura Continua, by Heinz Gregor Wieser,  Date of submission: May 4, 2001,  Medline SEARCH DATE: March 2001].

Heautoscopy had to do with seeing “your double”.   Heautoscopy was also believed to involve “out of body experiences” and as such, this certainly placed this very much in 1) the “spiritual” and/or 2) “near death” realm.   This certainly seemed to indicate that persons with these disorders could very well be among our most spiritual beings of all – and, certainly could be a double-edged sword given matters of spirituality could involve either “good” or “evil”.

Clearly, from an endtimes perspective, that certainly gave a whole new meaning to the phrase:  “I’ll believe it when I see it”.   If I could see my “double”, could technology in the form of an implant or something like vagus nerve therapy - the manipulation of the brain – come to allow someone else to see “my double” as well by stimulating the appropriate areas of the brain?  Science fiction?  Perhaps - but perhaps - this was not that far from “reality” either.  In my opinion, all of this was “very interesting” to say the least!

Within “psychic seizures” or “brain manipulation techniques” were all the makings for the endtimes deception of the masses predicted in the bible – a deception that would make brother turn against brother and many follow not Christ – but Satan.

The bible warned us not to be deceived and stated that “end times” would be times of great deception.  

Most Christians believed we were very much living near “end times”– a time of one world government, one world religion, a worldwide central bank, the mark of the beast – an implant that would become necessary in order to buy or sell – anything - government-controlled communications, transportation and on and on and on.  Growing up as a child, the idea of a “one world religion” had sounded kind of great – until I later realized that the “one world religion” of endtimes would be that not of Christ – but of Satan – a time when masses around the world would come to worship the Anti-Christ as revealed in the book of Revelation – the last book of the bible and also prophesized in many books of the Old Testament.  

Like the child with autism – we too – in my opinion – in focusing so desperately on the “parts” – had failed to see the whole!

The “clock” was very much ticking… and I had no time for anger, hate, vengeance or fear – and neither did my son!  I knew God was in control.  Judgement would come – and it would be fair!

Anger – and hate - could so easily consume and destroy.

“If you tell a lie long enough, loud enough and often enough, the people will believe it.”  Adolf Hitler

God had a plan and although we understood it not, I had complete confidence that everything, as the bible instructed, happened for a purpose... and thus, although I had a need to understand, I also very much knew that this understanding was very much, well-beyong man’s ability to comprehend.  

All I really needed to understand was that God was in control and that a disorder I had once believed to be “genetic” – along with so many others – appeared to be, in my opinion – man made!  

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DISCLAIMER - The statements here mentioned and/or found in my materials have not been evaluated by the FDA or any other government agency or person in the medical field or in behavior therapy and are not meant to diagnose, cure, treat or prevent any illness/disorder and/or behavior.  This information is not intended as medical advice or to replace the care of a qualified healthcare physician or behavior therapist.  Always consult your medical doctor or behavior therapist.  All information provided by Jeanne A. Brohart on her website is for INFORMATION PURPOSES and to GENERATE DISCUSSION ONLY and should not be taken as medical advice or any other type of "advice".  Information put forth represents the EXTENSIVE RESEARCH and OPINIONS of a mother based on her experiences and research and provides information as it relates to one family's journey with autism in hopes that other families may benefit from this experience and/or research.  The creator of this site is not responsible for content on other sites.

DISCLAIMER - PART II - Now... for those of you who think "mother at home researching" means "uneducated person with unfounded information"... I have 10 years of university... 3 degrees... and over 30,000 hours of research into these areas.   For anyone who thinks my research is "unfounded"...  read the RESEARCH FILE posted on my home page... with its over 1,000 references ... for your reading pleasure... because... quite clearly... you haven't read it yet!   Breaking The Code - Putting Pieces In Place!©