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The Basket Another exercise I did with Zachary was one whereby I gave him a small basket (anywhere from 4 inches to 8 inches across and perhaps 6 inches high) along with a whole bunch of everyday items in my house (small toys like blocks, plastic eggs, plastic toys, rattles, keys, beaded necklaces, rubber bands, very small stuffed animals, small plastic cups, etc.... really anything goes here as long as it was not a safety hazard - scissors for example would be a definite "no"). I threw in a few medium size objects as well and gave him the basket and "other objects" I could not fit in because there were just "too many" objects to start with. I put all these on the floor next to him. The idea was to give Zachary more than he could possibly put in his basket. I knew that Zachary would try to stuff absolutely everything into "his basket"... and he tried very hard to do so. The trick was just to make absolutely sure he had more than he could possibly fit into "his basket". Inevitably, no matter how hard he tried, however, some items fell out. At first, that caused him a great deal of frustration. Eventually though, he realized that it was futile to continue trying to "put everything in there" and he would eventually leave a few items behind... leaving a part to the whole behind. Once I saw him "ok" with leaving some things "out of the basket", I then did something else to work on the "all or none issue". I would gently take something away from him...telling him, "I have to show this to daddy..." or something else like that to help him cope with the fact that I was "removing" something from "the basket"... taking away a "part to his whole". I would take the item and go show it to his father (who was in the same room), then I would bring it back to Zachary and let him put it back in his basket. Zachary really screamed when "I stole something"... and he placed his hands over "his items" to prevent me from taking any of them. But, I would still manage to get one away and "go show daddy". Then, I would also take one of his items and place it on the refrigerator AS HE WATCHED ME DO THAT. Again, this really sparked his frustration...but, I knew that each time I did something like this and I made his frustration "come out", that I was on the right track! Eventually, he learned to cope with what I was doing and his frustration decreases a lot. Again, it was all a matter of increasing his flexibility, decreasing his fanatic need for complete "all or none" order.... and of course, labeling everything I did for him - the label was always the golden key in helping him cope! |
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